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Scones (with clotted cream) - In America, you can get a lot of bad scones — I remember introducing my friend Dave to an unfortunately dry, dense, and rock-hard version of them once at an little American cafe; after gnawing ineffectually at his for a few minutes he looked up at me and asked "What did you say these were called again, 'stones'?"

But a good scone with clotted cream and jam (jelly?) will far outweigh the tooth damage done by the wayward dry lump of concrete you might find living under the pseudonym "scone" in the U.S.. The only problem with scones with clotted cream is that they are becoming much less of an every-day food in England, going the same road into obscurity as cucumber sandwiches on white bread with the crusts cut off and other accouterments of High Tea

Most greasy spoon/diners don't serve scones with clotted cream, and many of these places are staffed by recent immigrants who will respond to your request with a confused look and the phrase "I can geeve you scone wit butter of wit jam. No cream. Cream in doughnut. You want doughnut?" Trust me: I got this response in caffs all over Bloomsbury and part of Holborn one morning in a search for scones with clotted cream.

Your best bet is to head for someplace that advertises they serve Afternoon Tea, like a fancy hotel. I won't say this often, but this is one of the very few wonderful British foods, and you should take advantage of it if you can.

Marrow - Squash. As this is a food item from the New World, the Brits must have coined this term within the last 500 years or so, so I don't know why they took a word that was already doing its job perfectly well in another realm of the language and conscripted it to apply to squash. Perhaps someone needs to go over there, crack open a bone, and show them what it is dogs are always so keen for.

"Bangers and Mash" - Sausage and mashed potatoes (when they aren't dressing them up for a night on the town, the English just love to mash their potatoes.) Despite the title for this section, this is actually a good dish, and one that I recommend you try.

Black Pudding - Don't let the name fool you. This is blood sausage, not a dessert. Just be thankful it's not Haggis, okay?

"Bubble and Squeak" - As should be obvious from the name, this is a concoction of cabbage and mashed potatoes. I think it sounds more like mouse stew, but that's just my opinion. I have never actually tried this particular dish to be able to pass judgment on it, but for a good reason. I am a bit suspicious of any food item where the cook feels the need to disguise the contents of the dish by applying a fanciful and misleading name. (For instance: I want to know who ever thought "sweetbreads" would be a good euphemism for "boiled thalamus glands.")

Cornish Pasty - A pasty from the land of Cornish. One of the many, many ways the English have of taking a pie crust and mincing together into it potatoes, meat and onions and hey keep on mincing and mincing to the point that they can throw in anything else they please and you'd be none the wiser.

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