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College - A dorm on a university campus, never used to refer to a school of higher learning in and of itself. It is also sometimes part of the name of what Americans would call a prep-school (likes "King's College" in London).

Condom - A condom (yes, I know that's obvious. I only mention it because in British, a "rubber" only means an eraser, not a prophylactic device, which could lead to a rather interesting bedroom encounter if you forget this piece of advice and if you don't check your packages before leaving the chemists.)

Disco - A club; a place where one can go dancing, toss down very expensive mixed drinks, and totally fail to make it with a single woman there.

Dustbin - Trash can (as if all that's ever in there is dust).

Dustman - Trashman (sorry, "A collector and dispatcher of others' used and unwanted items"), as in "My old man's a dustman, he wears a dustman's cap," something Winston Churchill used to mumble when he was drunk and was itching to bomb the the Axis powers.

Fag - A cigarette. Members of the Neo-Nazi, Good ol' Boys, Klan needn't get excited that they've found some kindered spirits across the ocean when they hear that people in England are going out "to smoke a fag;" those Brits are just addicted to cigarettes.

Fortnight - Two weeks. A handy little time index that has fallen out of use in American English, along with "quotidian"and "'til the cows come home."

Floors - O.K. It's real simple. The ground floor is called the "ground floor." In Europe they start counting floors above this ground floor. Therefore, the next floor is called the "first floor," not the second floor as it is in America. Keep counting up from there until they kick you out of the building for loitering.

Flat - A "flat" is an apartment. Unless it is located in New York, in which case you would call it a "long and skinny just wide enough for a twin bed with no kitchen." An apartment building is a "block of flats."

Hire - To rent, as in a car. Cars in England are now unionized, and you have to pay them a minimum wage plus benefits to hire them at full-time status, benefits which go into effect six-months after the date of employ or 30,000 miles, whichever comes first.

Holiday - A vacation. You say you are "On Holiday."

"In Hospital" - At the hospital, as in "I ate some pub food and now I'm in hospital being detoxed."

Laundrette - Laundromat. You know, the place where you go to watch your clothes spin in a circle, pretend to read Dostoyevsky, and try to pick up that beautiful brunette who owns that incredibly sexy neglig&eagiu; that you found mixed into your stuff from the dryer that one time and for over a month have been working on just the right line to hand it back to her with.

Let - To rent, as in a room or apartment (NOTE: this is not used for cars. "To rent a car," in British, is "stupid." See; "Hire").

Lift - An elevator. It goes up, and it goes down; it goes up, and it goes down; it goes up and it goes...well, you get the idea.

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